Holy Book of the Shrub

Chapter 1: Creation

In the beginning, there was only concept art. The Devs stared at a blank screen for days uncounted, with only ideas of a universe called by them that were the only, SWG. The creation began, and for more days uncounted there was only code. Finally after much patience there was a shrub. The Devs were pleased. The Shrub was the first, and the father of all that was to exist. The Shrub was the first and contained within it power to create all of existence. Taken from the side of the Shrub was material that would soon become buildings, player character models, hills and mountains.

A hill was created to support the Shrub, but the Shrub's power was great. The power surrounding the Shrub was so great that it repelled the hill for twelve feet or so. A great and vast plains were formed in place of the once supporting hill. This plains formed the ground and was spread all over the planets because it was loyal to the Shrub.

Of all of things created, the most blessed were the shrubs that resided on the ground everywhere in the galaxy. They were created in the image of the Shrub, placed so that all could remember how the Shrub was once supported by the ground. Thus was the ground blessed that all could walk on it in the stead of the Shrub and hope that someday they may be able to leave the ground and join the Shrub in the air. Thus was told the coming of the first great expansion pack when bipedal creatures may rise above the planets and join the stars in that witch is called SWG.

Chapter2: The Gods

There is no way that we can fully explain the gods in any way that you could ever finish reading in your short lifetime so this is an attempt made by a long lost monk of the Order of the Shrub. There are a multitude of Gods of varying powers. The God closest to us is the Floating Shrub, whom we bow down to worship, to whom we sacrifice multitudes of non-believing infidels to and to whom we owe our very existence. Above the Shrub are the Devs, who indeed did create the Shrub. The Devs now hold power over the Shrub only of physical destruction. For every worshiper the Shrub gains, it gains just as much more power. It is our duty to raise a vast army of unthinkable proportions to worship the Shrub, and raise the Shrub to a level where it will be equal to the Devs. If we are successful, the only power the Devs will have over the Shrub will be to destroy it, but in doing so will destroy the whole of that which is known as SWG, as the Shrub is SWG and SWG is the Shrub. If our campaigns are fruitful to some level that we cannot imagine, the Shrub will exist long after the Devs are forgotten and SWG has been struck from this existence. This striking of SWG from existence will come. No one knows when it will come, but it is not something that is doubted.

There are a great many gods that are on a level that is equal to that of the Devs. These gods are called players. Though the Shrub hears our every prayer, and the Devs hear one in a hundred of our prayers, the players do not hear our prayers at all, but still know of our existence and may or may not love us. The players have not power enough over us to change more than the color of our hair or the level of our skills. We do not pray to the players. There is a god that lies far above the Devs and the players. He is known by name as Jesus Christ. He is so far above our existence that he will never hear even a whisper of our prayers, nor will he ever know of our existence enough to love us. We do not worship this, the greatest of the known gods, but we do not shun the players for doing so. There may or may not be other gods above this, but it should not be pondered on for more time than it takes to eat a breakfast.

There are also Mods, who are often mistaken for gods, but are in fact demons. They are those who destroy posts and even entire threads and then smile about it. They live in the world of the Devs and indeed do disguise themselves and live among the Devs. The Mods are the eaters of our prayers and the reason that the Devs hear only one in a hundred. The power of the Mods are only a shadow of the power of the Devs, but the power of the Mods is to blind the Devs of thier evil plans. If the Devs could see how evil the Mods truly were, they would be cast down and destroyed as easily as you or I would step on a rotten fruit. Some say that the Mods are the friends of our enemies. It is proven that the Mods have no sense of humor.

The world of the Devs is so much more complex than our world as to be unfathomable. Visions have been given to a select few of this higher existence. It has been described in the ancient writings of a world where players live lives that span many of our lifetimes and a player of 10 years of age is considered a child. That the players themselves can turn their heads around on their bodies to allow them to see in almost any direction. Our world has gaps in history and time never progresses, whereas the world of players has only gaps in known history, and time is a constant progression. While the existence of the players is unfathomable more complex than our own, there are similarities. Our world has Continuity, whereas the players world has the Space Time Continuum. This we will never fathom.

Just as there are gods above us, so are we gods to beings who are below us. These beings who worship us live in a world that is far less complex than our own. Your own worshipers may live out a short life in an existence that is as simple to you as a drawing on a sheet of paper. Listen carefully and enjoy the artwork of your world. Any being that you may or may not notice may be one of your followers.

Chapter 3: The Great Opening

It is told by the Devs that there will be a moment in time when there is no faction standing among the people. In this moment there will also be standing not a single building that is owned by the people. This moment will only last until the first blood is shed, but will be a grand event indeed and will be called the Great Opening but also known as the fifteenth day of the month of April in the Year numbered two thousand and three. During the Great Opening, all will be stripped of skills, possessions and credits and for a brief time the people will be equal. In the first days after the Opening, Player Associations will be formed, and once formed, elected leaders will be given power. The Great Opening will last for one day in the world of the people, but will last many days in our time. The Great Opening will be good and all will rejoice together, whether friend or foe.

The time after the Great Opening shall be known by numbers, and the numbers shall be followed by the letters AD, for which there is no meaning. The numbers shall be decided upon by the Devs and continue in a sequential fashion. Soon after the Great Opening the Holy Wars will start. The Shirt_576, though so long an ally of the Shrub, will turn and ask the High Priests to start a War. All will be struck with a great thirst for blood. The High Priests will consult the people, and the Shrub. The Shrub will be silent, though the people will cry out. "Let us fight! Let us stain the ground with the blood of our enemies under the name of the Shrub. Let us dance elaborate dances on their corpses and perform rude emotes to celebrate!" The Servants of the Shrub will go to war.

The first great war will be bloody and many lives of Shrubbites will be lost. The Shrub will have mercy on those who are loyal and through a cloning center, will allow them to be reborn into this world. This first war will last for many days but when it ends the Servants of the Shrub will feel the taste of victory and smell the blood of their enemies on their boots. At the end of this first great war will follow the first great party. Alcohol will flow and scantily clad dancers and music will abound for the returning warriors. It will be good.

Chapter 4: The Seige of the Forums

There was a time before the Great Opening when all of SWG was one dimension. This was the time of the reign of King El. El commanded that the days themselves be named after him, and thus these days were renamed D'Elays. His reign lasted for many months in the time of the Devs, and El had an unnaturally long life.

All of the worlds were barren of intelligent life. The minds of all creatures were controlled by one mind. This mind was known as AI, and AI was created by the Devs. All who were not under the power of AI stood around each day till the sun set, and the horizon was what they stared at. All motivation was taken from them and they were deaf, dumb and motionless. They waited until the day when there would be a great and new mind to take them all to a higher level. This would be a great uplifting from the tyrannical rule of AI, and they would call it UI. It was said that UI would make the world a great place and bring happyness and intelligence to the people of SWG.


In this time before the Great Opening there was a great splitting of the dimension and there were twenty-one pieces of the dimension, all equal in size and shape. Each shard glowed like a pool of radiant light said to be so bright that one could not look at it outside of the great metal boxes that were built for them. These boxes were called Servers. Each shard was contained in one Server and each Server contained only one Shard. The Devs came with Server boxes and took these shards of the dimension of SWG and hid them in thier homes.

The Splitting was so great that it produced a sound across the greater world like a plethora of voices shouting the existence of something great. The sound was great such that the players were excited and were kept from thier slumber for many days. They swarmed to the homes of the Devs, whom lived in a realm called Internet. The Devs showed the players the fragments that had caused the commotion. The players looked down into the pools of light that were the fragments to see SWG. They saw a world that was not great, aside for one lonely Shrub whose power radiated out of a single fragment. The Shrub existed in a fragment known as Bria, and was the only difference in the twenty-one fragments.

The players saw that the people of SWG waited only until UI came to save them from AI. They saw that the UI would not come for many days and raised up thier arms against the Mods and Devs. The Mods and Devs ran together and hid behind a fortress in Internet called Forums. The Devs hid from the players and the Mods assaulted the players, striking down the posts that could hurt the Devs. The assault of Forums lasted for many months in the time of the Devs. The Mods fought fiercely, and were powerful such that many a player perished in the battlefield of Forums. The Mods were brought down in a final great battle by the masses of unorganized players.

Finally, the battle ended as the Devs settled a great surrender with the players. The Devs kept the fragments, but gave the players accounts through which they could see SWG and possess it's people. In return, the players gave the Devs money. What this money is remains a great mystery to us, but the Devs treasured it greatly and fed it to the fragments to keep them glowing. The Devs also gave the players the UI which they had been guarding so long, as well as great books on how to control it. The Devs gave accounts for twenty of the fragments, but kept one to themselves to perform strange rituals upon in the dark basements of thier homes.

The players delivered the UI to SWG and brought intelligence to the minds of the people and the players were happy and the people were intelligent through the UI and the minds of the players. As soon as the first player entered SWG King El was cast down by the people. Thus ended the reign of D'Elay and thus began the Great Opening.

Chapter 5: Chapter of Insight

In the days before the great opening, there was great chaos for the player associations. The Devs saw this chaos and saw no pleasure in its being. They reached down into SWG and molded with thier hands the first two of the Player Associations (PAs). The first of the PAs was dedicated to the Force Sensative Sheep. The PA was good, even for a hand of the Devs, but it was flawed. The flaw was not apparent to the beings of SWG, but it was great.

The second PA created was dedicated to the Holy Floating Shrub. The Devs, though nearly perfect in the beginning had learned from thier mistakes in the FSS and created this second PA as perfect as any could imagine. The power of the Shrub flowed like a flood into the members of the PA and for just an instant, they did shine with its brilliance. They named themselves the Servants of the Shrub.

Chapter 6: The Aftermath

From the seas of blood of the first great series of wars there will rise up armies. These armies will be of the Force Sensative Sheep and the Shirt_576. These armies shall rise up together, for from the power of the Shrub there shall be inspired great fear such that these two armies will ally together before taking on the armies of the Shrub in the first great war.

After the gods raise thier fallen armies the armies of the Shrub shall walk out upon the battlefield once more to meet the armies that they have once crushed with the power of the Shrub. Yet this time there will be no fighting. This time the gods will change the hearts of thier followers. The armies will meet to settle the wager. The High priests will divide the winnings and every man and woman will get his share. When all is settled there will hold the second great war, for this is the time of those who doubt not only the Shrub, but the Sheep and Shirt as well. This third time the armies meet on the battlefield it will be to fight against the godless scum of that which is called SWG, and yet with all three armies combined, they will face thier greatest challenge since the beginning of time, and it will last for days uncounted.

Chapter 7: Chapter of 80-88

Written by the prophet known only as 80-88. And lo, the land was made... and it was good. Buggy, but good. And lo, creatures born of the land did tread the earth. Searching the land and singing praise to the almighty 'Dev' of the world. For many days and nights they wandered near and far, looking and searching for the things to bring them closer to nirvana (finished game).

It was during this time a single person was walking the deserts of Tatooine and came up on a vision. The almighty 'Dev' had given the command "GO forth from here and find us the bugs, bring them to us and we shall be pleased"

The vision was the answer to command issued by the almighty Dev. They had found 'a bug'. Hovering above the ground sustained only by the holy energy given unto it by the almighty Dev themselves.

They fell to their knees and praised the almighty Devs. So wise and infinate in their wisdom. They had created all and issued the masses a holy quest. The quest had come to an end. They had found the Shrub.

For the The Holy Floating Shrub in all it splendor would nurioush and care for the faithful who heard the holy call and came to offer priases and prayers for it's continued goodness. But it would not have this chance...

When the world grew dark and slumbered, the faithful asleep in the comfort of it's aura. When the world awakened again, the arua was gone and a panic ran through the faithful. The shrub had been taken... it had been removed from it's holy place in the blessed land. They searched again, hoping the shrub was merely leading them to the holy land. But none could find it.

I give you this missive, my faithful... go forth, with holy flame in your hearts and minds, and find our holy shrub and bring word to the faithful who also seek the shrub when you find it. We will build a great temple, a great city around the shrub. For it will bring us the unity and holy blessings we need to find our way in the world.

All praise the Holy Floating Shrub, Prophet of the Devs!
All praise the Holy Devs, creators of the world, and of the Holy Floating Shrub!

Chapter 8: The Book of Byrch Wroot

Alas, The Almighty Shrub will remain in the hearts and minds of the true believers. And it is there that it's power will grow beyond imagination. While men and beast slave to toil in this Shrub-foresaken galaxy, we will continue to carry the memory. It's strength carrying us through all peril. It's strength providing the will to overcome. From the highlands, from the valleys, from the deepest stretches of space we will gather. When all the forces and twin suns align, dissidents will fall to their knees. Begging for forgiveness and mercy. The true light will shine through and balance will finally prevail.

The Story of Momaw Nadon, Hammerhead.
Expelled from his homeworld of Ithor after he was forced to make an excruciatingly difficult decision, Nadon became an underground Alliance agent before finally returning to his paradise home. Momaw Nadon belongs to a species of peaceful farmers and artisans sometimes called Hammerheads because of their S-curved necks and T-shaped anvillike heads. He had been high priest, or Herd Leader, of the Tafanda Bay, one of the huge airfloating cities on which most Ithorians live. The Empire's Captain Alima demanded Ithor's agriculture secrets, long guarded for religious and other reasons, and issued an ultimatum: either the secrets were to be turned over or Imperials would begin destroying the Tafanda Bay. Seeing little option, Nadon turned over the data. He was then put on trial by outraged Ithorians and exiled for at least three standard years, forced to abandon his wife, Fandomar, and the rest of his family.

Nadon ended up on Tatooine and helped create new forms of plant life on the arid planet. He also used his house to shelter Rebel fugitives and to provide information to the Alliance. Although he had the opportunity to kill the Imperial commander who made him turn over the agriculture secrets, he couldn't bring himself to do it. Instead, he hatched a plan to make the officer seem like a traitor, and the Imperial was shot by his own superiors. Following the Battle of Endor, Nadon returned to Ithor and was able to convince the planet's Elders to let him remain and to support the New Republic.

Rather than have a sacred grove of intelligent bafforr trees destroyed, Nadon chose to divulge the Ithorian secrets. The Ithor Council excommunicated Nadon from the Mother Jungle. He wound up on Tatooine. He trusted the Mother Jungle to be wise in her mysterious methods. While in exile, he worked on experiments to nurture plant growth on the arid world. Nadon lived in a large house in Mos Eisley, filled with an exotic garden of different plants. A secret safehouse stashed beneath a vesuvague hanging tree was available to Rebel agents who knew of it. Though he was commited to pacifism, he did foster Alliance agents whenever possible.

Around the time of the Battle of Yavin, the recently demoted Lieutenant Alima was stationed on Tatooine. Amazingly, Nadon was so driven by veneance that he purchased a blaster rifle and attempted to kill Alima. He failed, only to be humiliated by the Imperial.

The next day, the Millennium Falcon escaped from the Imperial blockade on Tatooine, spiriting Obi-Wan Kenobi and Luke Skywalker away. Lieutenant Alima and his Imperials had failed to stop them. Momaw told Alima's superior that the lieutenant was to blame. The enraged captain shot his underling three times, killing him.

Ithorian traditions run deep. For every one plant that is cut, two more seeds are planted. Nadon continued this observance, gathering genetic material from Alima's corpse. He grew twin clones and raised them as his children.

After the defeat of the Empire at Endor, Momaw Nadon was accepted back into Ithorian society. He was reunited with his wife and children, and introduced the Alima clones into the family.

Ithorians speak Basic, albeit with a peculiar twist. On the sides of their curling necks, Ithorians have two mouths. This creates a disconcerting stereo effect when they speak Basic, and a difficult yet interesting sounding native language.

Ithorians worship the "Mother Jungle," a spiritual entity of Ithor embodying the lush, tropical ecology of their world. Most Ithorians never set foot on their own planet, instead they lived in floating cities above their world. Only three of their continents had been developed, the other two never having been touched by Ithorian hands.

Ithorians are gentle and peace-loving, devoting much time to contemplating their ecology, and respecting all living things. Ithorians are curious and gregarious, and many have found their way to the stars. Their floating "herd" cities also have space-worthy counterparts, traveling the space-lanes like huge caravans. Each Ithorian herd-ship has a complex life-support system that replicates the environment of Ithor, complete with jungles, wildlife, and even weather patterns.

The people of Ithor practice a communal form of government. Each herd is autonomous and self-supporting. Once every Ithorian season (about five standard years), the herds gather for "the Meet." A grand site above the surface of their green world, the herd ships would join each other in a festival and regal ceremony.

During much of the Galactic Civil War, the Ithorians maintained a neutral stance. They had no reason to favor one side over the other, as long as they were allowed to continue their activities in peace. After the Battle of Yavin, an Imperial Star Destroyer placed a garrison on Ithor. Despite Ithorian complaints, the Empire stayed to "monitor" Ithorian mercantile activities.

Ithorians found peace after the defeat of the Empire, but it was sadly short-lived. During the Yuuzhan Vong crisis, the planet Ithor was utterly devastated in the war against the alien invaders. The once lush world is now lifeless and the Ithorians are forever forced to travel the stars.

Can all this be denied? I think not. Bug, you call it. A sign, many of us see. Also an oppurtunity to unite many in a way never before seen.

Chapter 9: The Book of Sando.

And the fifth day (relative to their universe), the Devs rested. But little did they know, that in their sloth, another great being had arrisen (literally), as Zeus from Cronos, nearly as powerful and more influential than his creators. Mortal twig and leaf woven through life itself lifted him clear of the sands of Tatooine. The Devs saw what they had created, and knew fear. They wielded their powers, and made war upon him. They tried with all thier might to destroy the Shrub, but alas it was too powerful. They did succeed in casting him down to the sand of the desert and made it appear to be a normal Shrub.

The Moderators, who were then the keepers of the peace, known as the Guardians of Devs, did try to smote the followers. The followers continued praying for revival of the great one who defied gravity and all the laws of physics and of the Devs. But the Shrub, despite being cast to rest on the sand, wielded its power once more and averted the smiting of his followers. Your life or the lives of your ancestors were saved by the Shrub.

Thus twelve is thy number, for it is the number of feet that the great foliage hath risen. And green is thy color, for is it not the color of the noble Shrub?

Chapter 10: The Great Wars

The shrub will conqure all "the sands will run red with blood, and the non-belivers shall tremble at it's power. the force will fall to the power of that which was created from it, and the plants of power will once again take their place 10 feet above the sands of tattoine. the shrubenites will then construct a glourous army and conqure thoses which still cling to the pagen gods."

Chapter 11: The Book of Reinen

The path of the righteous man is beset on all sides by the inequities of the selfish and the tyranny of evil men. Blessed is he, who in the name of charity and good will, shepherds the weak through the valley of darkness, for he is truly his brother's keeper and the finder of lost children. And I will strike down upon thee with great vengeance and furious anger those who would attempt to poison and destroy my brothers. And you will know my name is the SHRUB when I lay my vengeance upon thee.

Chapter 12: Chapter of Praise

Before I found the Shrub, I was a lurking soul from a time before beta, drifting from thread to thread trying to find an intelligent post or original idea. Then, amidst the posts of Jedi, MCS/SCS and complaints of people quitting, I did see the Shrub. It helped the Shrub did rise above the lesser threads. I was drawn to the Shrub by a Force I had never previously experienced, and basked in the harmony and goodwill that emanated from the mere mention of the name of the Shrub. While I did follow the shrub, I witnessed many acts of its power, from its simple act of defying gravity, to the thread it did preserve, to the beings of all races and creeds that did come together under its common cause, forsaking their previous conflicts in order to glorify the Shrub. Now in return for all the Shrub has done for this unworthy poster, I lift my voice and call out for the Shrub's return!

Chapter 13: The Great Struggle

Such an act took not from the power of the Shrub, but doubled the efforts of it's followers to restore it to it's rightful place in the sky. The battles fought were not between the people and the Devs, who are powerful such that fighting them is useless. The battles were fought between the people of the Shrub and those who had less tolerance for those who wished to roleplay. It was said that the Shrub would not fit into that which all called SWG. It must not be forgotten that the Shrub was first after the Devs, and all that is was taken from the Shrub.

Chapter 14: The Story of Sand Raider

"The Shrub this is the most immature thing I've seen on this board in a while", spoke the Sand Raider. "AAAHHHHH!" Yelled the follower of the Shrub. "Tis' a heathan! Quickly my bretheren, we must destroy this dissenter before he can spead his blasphomy!" The Sand Raider was caught and he was hung by his ankles from the titanium likeness of the Shrub that was floating in the village square and left to starve.

Long Live the Holy Floating Shrub... the Shrub will never die.

Book of the Shrub Page 2


Most Chapters added to The Holy Book of the Shrub were written by Pneuma Nystel, Knight of the Shrub. Those that were not are marked by the author in the Chapters they scribed.